AITA for telling my wife I wish she would take care of herself like her friends do?

Relationships often start with sparks, shared dreams, and promises of compromise. But what happens when the small things — like appearance, effort, and respect for boundaries — become the cracks that grow wider over time? That’s where I find myself. I love my wife, but I can’t shake the feeling that she’s stopped trying, and when I finally voiced my frustration, everything blew up. Now I’m left questioning if I crossed the line or if my concerns are valid.

A Perfect Match… With One Big Difference

The Ground Rules of Our Relationship

Almost Breaking Up Over Broken Promises

Marriage, Comfort, and Old Habits

Comparisons That Cut Deep

Fallout and Family Backlash

Let’s hear the community’s take on this wild story.

So here I am, being called shallow, controlling, and insensitive by my wife’s family for expressing what I thought was a fair expectation. I’ve kept up with the things she asked of me, but she brushed off mine as if they didn’t matter. Was I wrong to finally snap and say out loud what I’d been feeling for years — or is it fair to want your partner to put in the same effort you do?